How to Start a Custom Engagement Ring in Buffalo (Surprise or Shopping Together)

So you're ready to start on a custom engagement ring. Congratulations!

For a lot of people, "custom" sounds like a big, mysterious project with a big, mysterious price tag.

Here's a secret from our side of the counter. Almost 95% of the engagement rings we sell are special ordered. Very few leave straight out of the case, so a ring made just for you is a lot closer to normal than most people think.

This guide walks you through how we start a custom engagement ring at Ben Garelick, online and in our Williamsville showroom. We'll go from the very first clues all the way to pickup day.

Let's start with the one question that changes everything.

Surprise or Shopping Together?

Every custom ring we make starts in one of two places.

Some customers are planning a surprise and shopping on their own. Others walk in hand in hand with their partner.

The two journeys look very different, so we'll take them one at a time.

Planning a Surprise? Play Detective

If you're shopping alone, your first job is to gather clues.

Start with the jewelry your partner already wears, and pay the most attention to the metal color. If they mostly wear silver, white gold is probably the way to go. If they reach for a gold necklace or bracelet every day, that's a strong hint toward yellow gold.

If your partner isn't a big jewelry person, check Pinterest. Saved pins say a lot about someone's style. An engagement ring board says even more.

Last, ask their friends. Hints get dropped, and close friends usually hear them first.

Once you have some inspiration, bring it in. Screenshots on your phone are perfect. We'll show you similar rings and work to get as close as possible to what your partner loves.

Many surprise shoppers also want to add a little touch of themselves. Two easy ways to do it: engrave a message inside the band, or set a birthstone on the inside of the ring where only the two of you know it's there.

Shopping Together? The Ring Wearer Leads

When couples shop together, the appointment is completely different.

In most cases, the one who will wear the ring takes the lead. They usually arrive full of opinions on what they like, and that's a great thing.

We encourage them to try on a wide range of shapes and styles, just to be sure they like what they think they like. We never push a design. We listen.

The ring wearer will ask their partner's opinion too. Most of the time that's to confirm what they already loved, and most partners happily agree because they want to make them happy.

Not ready to give up the surprise completely? Here's something that has worked nicely for our couples. During an in-store consultation, we write down the top two or three favorite rings. The final choice stays a secret, so the style itself becomes the surprise.

What Custom Really Means

Here's the biggest misconception we hear. Many shoppers assume a jeweler keeps every ring style in stock in every finger size, with every carat weight of center diamond, ready to go.

That's rarely how it works. The good news is that any ring can be made to hold any shape or size of diamond or gemstone, in any metal.

Custom comes in two levels at Ben Garelick:

• Modified special order. Start with a design you love and change the parts you want, like the shape or size of the center stone. Most people who ask us for a "custom ring" land here. It's also the route we suggest when the budget or the timeline is tighter.
• Fully custom design. Our design team builds your ring as a CAD (a 3D computer rendering) and refines it with you before it goes into production. If you have time and room in your budget, this is the way to go.

Custom doesn't have to be expensive or slow, either. If you can make decisions quickly, the CAD step only adds a few days. Overall, a fully custom ring typically takes about one and a half to two weeks longer than a special order.

Want to see what's possible? Browse our custom engagement rings, look through the custom engagement ring gallery or read about the custom ring features our customers request most.

Featured Custom Engagement Rings

A Recent Custom Favorite: The Bellatrix

Here's a recent project that shows how far a few changes can go.

The starting point was our Ben Garelick Bellatrix Marquise Diamond Crown Engagement Ring. The customer wanted a 4.29 carat marquise lab-grown diamond in the center. We also replaced some of the side diamonds with marquise-shaped opals.

The customer's reaction when the finished ring was revealed? "Oh my god. She's STUNNING." Followed by: "You're a genius."

How Long Does a Custom Engagement Ring Take?

Here's how the timing usually works:

• CAD renderings: about 24 to 48 hours for each version. Most designs need one or two rounds of changes before production.
• Special order from a design in our showroom: about 3 to 3.5 weeks.
• Fully custom: add roughly 1.5 to 2 weeks.
• Setting the center diamond: a couple of business days.
• Wax model (optional): add about 2 weeks.

We email or text CADs to you, or we review them together on screen in the showroom. Local customers who can't make it in can get theirs by email or text too.

Some customers like to hold a wax model of the ring before it goes into production. We're happy to make one. Just plan on the extra two weeks.

In a real rush, select designers and styles, including our own Ben Garelick design team, can complete a special order in about two weeks. We don't encourage it, especially around the holidays when we get very busy. We can sometimes set an engagement ring diamond in a single day, but we'd rather not rush that step if we can avoid it.

What Drives the Price of a Custom Ring?

Let's be honest about budget, because it shapes every other decision.

A design that uses more metal costs more. A more complex design costs more too, and the reason surprises people. The extra cost comes from the extra diamonds or gemstones a complex design usually holds, plus the skilled labor it takes to set each one.

A couple more costs to plan for:

• A mold for true custom work. Add about $150 to $350.
• Speed. If we need to rush in a diamond we don't have in stock, or ship your finished ring quickly, expect expedited shipping fees.

Be realistic, too. A wide gold band with a big diamond needs a budget that can cover both. We would love to have a magic wand to wave, but unfortunately we don't.

For real price ranges, read our guide to how much an engagement ring should cost.

Lab-Grown or Natural Diamond?

Lab-grown and natural diamonds are both real diamonds, with the same chemical makeup. We explain the differences and let you decide. We never try to talk anyone into one over the other.

Most of our engagement ring customers arrive with their minds already made up on lab-grown.

Natural diamonds still have their fans, and we've seen a slight uptick in natural diamond requests lately. Shoppers who come in for a natural diamond are sometimes curious about lab-grown and a little shy to ask. If that's you, ask! Once people hear the price of the same diamond in lab-grown and natural, their ears definitely perk up.

Some still choose natural because of how they feel a lab-grown diamond might be perceived. That's a completely valid choice.

As for trends, we're seeing more requests for lab-grown Moval center diamonds (a marquise shape with rounded corners) and for green lab-grown diamonds. Browse our lab-grown diamond engagement rings and lab-grown color diamond engagement rings. For a deeper dive, read Are Lab-Grown Diamonds Worth It? A Jeweler's Honest Take.

Getting the Ring Size Without Ruining the Surprise

Shopping together? Easy. We size the ring wearer right in the store.

For a surprise, try this. Borrow a ring your partner already wears. Slide it down one of your own fingers until it stops comfortably, and mark that spot with a marker. Then come in and we'll take the measurement.

Expect it to be off by about a size in either direction, since they probably wear that ring on a different finger. It still gets us close.

We can also lend you one of our ring sizers to measure at home, though that tends to give away the surprise. Shopping online and need a sizer before you buy? Contact us and we'll send one out to you.

One important note. Rings with a lot of side stones, like baguette or princess cut side diamonds, can only be resized about one size up or down. Beyond that, they need to be remade. If you choose one of those designs, we'll let you know before we make it that we need a reliable finger size.

More tips are in our guide on how to measure ring size for an engagement ring.

A Safety Net: Gabriel & Co. Shop Confidently

Want to go custom with a safety net? One of our designers, Gabriel & Co., offers the Shop Confidently program, and it applies both online and in our store.

When you purchase a Gabriel & Co. engagement ring from Ben Garelick you get the option to exchange your ring for another Gabriel & Co. setting of equal or higher value.

The program rules:

1. The ring must be registered at time of purchase.
2. Exchange program is valid for one year from the date of purchase.
3. Applies to the Gabriel & Co. engagement ring setting only. Center stone not included.
4. One exchange permitted, with the full value credited toward another Gabriel & Co. engagement ring of equal or higher value.
5. Custom order engagement rings are included in the program.

Pickup Day and Beyond

Pickup day is the fun part. We'll show you the finished ring and ask how you plan to propose.

Your answer decides the box. A slim ring box slips into a pants pocket or blazer without a telltale bulge. A light-up box is a bulkier, but it adds a little extra shine to the big moment.

We'll also go over the appraisal and how to protect your ring with insurance and a care plan.

You'll leave with a claim ticket for a free bridal bag. When the two of you come in to pick it up, we check that the ring fits properly. If it doesn't, the first sizing is on the house. The one exception is the complex side-stone designs mentioned above.

After that, bring the ring in for a free cleaning and check-up at least every six months. Our favorite way to remember is to do it the same week as your dentist appointment.

Our warranty, care and insurance page covers the Ben Garelick warranty, the Jewelers Mutual Care Plan and our jewelry insurance advice in detail.

Why the Jeweler You Choose Matters

There are great jewelers out there, in Buffalo and online. We sell online too. What matters most is finding a team that works at your pace.

For us, that means the family-style atmosphere Ben Garelick has kept since 1952. Our Sparkle Consultants will walk you through every step, as slowly or as quickly as you like.

A customer called us recently after falling for one of our ring styles online. Before that, he had been working with another online engagement ring company. Every time he talked to them, he could hear the call center in the background, and the design process felt like a factory conveyor belt. He "listened to his gut" and stopped working with them.

With us, he appreciated the personal touch. We listened and never pushed, and we guided him whenever he asked for direction.

Reviews are a great way to judge how a jeweler treats people. Look for lots of five-star reviews and read what customers say about the process. You can read ours on our reviews page.

Our Recommendation: Start With a Conversation

If you do one thing tonight, have a real conversation about the ring. Talk through what you both want and what you're comfortable spending. Cover the metal and the shape of the diamond, then talk about timing.

This ring will be on a finger for the rest of a lifetime, so it deserves the conversation. (Got a long wish list? Save some of it for later. A beautiful diamond bracelet makes a great birthday or anniversary surprise down the road.)

You don't need every detail decided before you walk in or start a chat with us online. A solid foundation of conversation is plenty, and we'll take it from there.

Then choose the jeweler where you'll feel most comfortable. We'd love for that to be us.

Book a consultation at our showroom at 5001 Transit Road in Williamsville. Not nearby? Send us a free custom design request and we'll start from there. You can also call us at (716) 631-1584 or text (888) 841-5391.