A Guide to Understanding Love Languages
The Five Love Languages is a book originally published by Gary Chapman almost thirty years ago, but the principles it lays out have enjoyed a resurgence recently. In some cases, your partner’s love language may be as clear as day, but others may be a little more nuanced or a combination of more than one. We’ve put together a quick guide about all five, and how to better connect with each one.
Words of Affirmation
If your partner’s love language is words of affirmation, they will be fond of trading compliments, saying “I love you” daily (at a minimum) and a healthy amount of verbal appreciation. People who value words of affirmation might not necessarily need them to be out loud – a quick, sweet text on your lunch break says more than you think.
People whose love language is quality time value the physical presence of their loved one, whether that’s just hanging out or taking on big adventures and creating future memories together. Quality time is all about giving your full attention to your partner – FaceTime won’t cut it here.
This one can often overlap with other love languages – you might find yourselves exchanging words of affirmation or some loving physical touch while spending time together.
If your partner always needs to be touching you, sitting next to you, resting their head on your knees and staring at you while you eat, your partner may be a Border Collie😉 If they just like to cuddle, hold hands and really value a hug after a long day, they’re probably a human whose love language is physical touch.
A common misconception about this love language is that it’s all about sex – in actuality, it’s more about valuing intimate, yet often platonic, means of non-verbal communication. Think a quick kiss, cuddling up on the couch, and holding hands when walking side-by-side. While a permanent fixture like a ring is a good start, there’s no replacement for real-life physical contact with your loved one.
Acts of Service
Life isn’t always easy, for any of us. While we all enjoy someone going out of their way to make life a little breezier, people with the love language of acts of service believe that actions speak louder than words. This means things like cooking dinner, making their morning coffee or picking them up when it’s raining.
If you’ve found the one and their love language is acts of service, this is how they’ll know they’re appreciated. While people with love languages such as physical touch or words of affirmation prefer to feel or hear affection, people who value acts of service feel loved when they can see it in action.
Receiving gifts is a relatively self-explanatory love language. People who value gifts don’t necessarily expect every day to be a birthday, but will feel warm and fuzzy when presented with tangible tokens of love.
It’s not about money either – as the old saying goes, it’s the thought that counts. Taking the time and effort to choose (or make) a gift that perfectly suits your partner and tells them you love them without a word is what this love language is all about. Whether that be as small as a card or as grand as some jewelry.
People who love receiving gifts also tend to enjoy giving them, so make sure to show appreciation when you’re on the receiving end, even if you’ve got one of the other four love languages.
Hopefully this guide has given you a clearer idea about the five love languages, and maybe even helped you identify your partner’s (or your own)! If you’ve got a renewed desire to show your partner some love, we can help. Call us today at (716) 631-1584, text us at (716) 574-0966, visit us at our Buffalo, NY location or chat with our jewelry experts.